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GOURANGA! Forums > General > Off Topic > Evil prank ideas
Post 1 | New
Bryan Spence
Cranky old Bastard

  • Joined: Sep '05
  • Posts: 111
Ok, heres the story - theres a guy at work who annoys everyone. He destroyed one of my hats by covering it bleach, he has let down the tires of most of the staff, he never works, rarley shows up for work, always complains, bullies the younder staff and is just disrespectful of everyone he meets. We have nearly come to fist fighting on several occasions. He needs taking down a peg.

Now within the place I work there are certain "kliqs". If we do something to him, his kliq (which has a manager in tow) gets us back. The same happens if he does something to us. Now I need an idea for a prank that can't be bettered and will end the bad blood.

And heres where you come in!

Things to know about him (possible weeknesses)
 - Obsessed with his looks (Shave his hair?)
 - Hates to have his sexuality questioned in public (Out him in the local newspaper?)
 - Rather partial to cakes (Lace one with viagra before an 8 hour shift?)
 - Very possesive of his clothes (Used condom in his coat pocket?)

To summarise hes a jerk. Help me get him.

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Post 2 | New
Richard Zurawski
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Well I find that pouring a couple of gallons of brake fluid all over someones car will usually do the trick in pissing them off and bringing them down a peg or two. However, that would be considered blatant vandalism and by the sounds of it, you don't want to take things that far.

You could always photoshop his face onto a picture of another persons naked body (preferably with a small penis), then print off lots of glossy posters and plaster them all over your place of work.

What sort of an environment do you work in? Knowing this will make suggestions easier.

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Post 3 | New
Bryan Spence
Cranky old Bastard

  • Joined: Sep '05
  • Posts: 111
It a super market. Not a happy place really. At least its just part time.

 Anonymous wrote:
You could always photoshop his face onto a picture of another persons naked body (preferably with a small penis), then print off lots of glossy posters and plaster them all over your place of work.  


For that i'd have to looking for a doner picture, i'm not going down THAT road...

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Bring back the old days! Go forth and make 2D cars, enjoy the simplicity, the beauty and the triumph.

Bring back "The One" /  "Car of the Week" /  "Smashed Headlight"
Post 4 | New
scully
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  • Joined: Feb '03
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Announce over the stores PA system that his gay lover/life partner is looking for him. His test came back positive for herps.

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Post 5 | New
That Shit Touge
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Find out where he lives and commence whatever there, then it'll be assumed that it is neighbours etc. causing the problems rather than colleagues.

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Post 6 | New
Alfadog
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Touge knows how to do it!

Brake fluid over someones car... I hope you have never done that Richard. Nothing - NOTHING - justifies that.

I like the used condom thing. You could do it regularly too, it would really piss him off.

Other than that, I dont know, Im not really good at being mean...!

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Post 7 | New
DaDa123
  • Joined: Aug '03
  • Posts: 963
Wouldn't the best way to solve this is to just
go a talk with your manager?

If you gather more people on your side then maybe he might listen.
And help you solve your issues with that stewpiddd cunt.

What is that guy's job anyway?

IF his job it to place those product on the shelves, you can
probably do is move his stuff to diffreent asiles.

Unless there are security camera catching your every move.
Post 8 | New
-LoKi-
. doppelgänger

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lol dada.

i reckon scully is spot on, saying he's gay over the loud speaker might really piss him off...

you could even hire a male stripper to come in and dance all over him in the isle...   i'm sure your customers would get a kick out of it, and he'd surely be embarrased...

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Post 9 | New
Richard Zurawski
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Alfadog wrote:
Brake fluid over someones car... I hope you have never done that Richard. Nothing - NOTHING - justifies that.


Personally, no I've never done that and I agree that it would require a very serious situation to warrant that type of punishment.

A friend was driving on the freeway and was being tailgated by some idiot, so she tapped her brakes as a warning for him to back off. However, this fellla overtook her and slammed on his brakes causing her to rear-end him. There was no traffic ahead or any reason to do this, he did it purely out of spite. The insurer's rule, is that if you rear-end someone, it is your fault, period. So she ended up with a written off car, an increased insurance premium and she had to pay the $800 excess on the repairs of his car. Do late one night after his car was fresh from the bodyshop, her husband and friends (I wasn't there) poured it all over this arsehole's car.

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Post 10 | New
2na
Beans, eating it!

  • Joined: Feb '03
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Just kick the shit out of him.

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Post 11 | New
Alfadog
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Richard Zurawski wrote:
Alfadog wrote:
Brake fluid over someones car... I hope you have never done that Richard. Nothing - NOTHING - justifies that.


Personally, no I've never done that and I agree that it would require a very serious situation to warrant that type of punishment.

A friend was driving on the freeway and was being tailgated by some idiot, so she tapped her brakes as a warning for him to back off. However, this fellla overtook her and slammed on his brakes causing her to rear-end him. There was no traffic ahead or any reason to do this, he did it purely out of spite. The insurer's rule, is that if you rear-end someone, it is your fault, period. So she ended up with a written off car, an increased insurance premium and she had to pay the $800 excess on the repairs of his car. Do late one night after his car was fresh from the bodyshop, her husband and friends (I wasn't there) poured it all over this arsehole's car.


Ah yes, OK once you fuck with someone's car,then it's OK  yes  yes Plus that guy sounds like a real asswipe.

Speaking of rear-enders, I had a similar thing almost happen to me in 2002. I was approaching a round-a-bout down a hill, in the rain, after school. I had left enough room to brake and was slowing down to approach when this stupid damn woman steered right into my lane right in front of me!! Now Camrys aren't exactly performance cars but in the wet they can outbrake pretty much any 30 year old car. I simply did not have enough room to brake - I tried but wheels were locking up and I knew I was going to plough right into the rear of her. And I knew it would be "my fault". Luckily my awesome abilities enabled me to avoid it as I jumped the kerb onto the median strip and stopped neatly between a tree and her car - the bonnet of my car sitting about where her rear seats were. I tried to give her an evil glare but she was COMPLETELY UNAWARE of what had just happened. I felt like getting out and giving her a serve, but I was pretty shaken up. My first "almost accident"... had to reverse back out (thankfully traffic behind was not as nonchalant) and timidly drive home.

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Post 12 | New
2na
Beans, eating it!

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Close calls suck balls, back when I had my little swift some faggot on a mobile phone in a 4x4 (huge stereotype I know, but that?s exactly what it was) violently switched up lanes with me still in the lane luckily I saw him coming and ended up in the breakdown lane.  The CUNT didn?t even give a ?sorry? wave.

Also a truck switched up lanes on me while I was on the highway, I was halfway past his container, if he didn?t realise thanks to my horn I would of ended up crushed like a bug.

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Post 13 | New
Cerbera
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I don't have a car.  Cycling actually seems safer than driving!

If the guy regularly doesn't show up on time for work, use The System? against him and report him to managers.  Once he gets fired (they'll normally give a few warnings first) it's job done: he's out of your face and can't afford beauty products any more.

I got fired from Tesco after two years of being a few minutes late to work every week, so this method might take a while.  If he's amazingly late, like by hours, then it should be a doddle.

If his manegerial bum-chums let him get away with it, report them to higher-ups.  Eventually a jobsworth like me will find out and throw the book at the whole lot!

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Post 14 | New
Dup
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Punch the cunt in the face and tell him he's been a naughty little boy.

Works for me.

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Post 15 | New
groovealex
omg, ifos!

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BING!
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