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I want to talk to you about a man named Daniel Hirst. A man many of you will know around here as Touge.
I've known Mr. Hirst for many years now and have shared extensive conversations over MSN with him about many diverse topics, such as the nature of love, life and work. He is a charismatic, sensible speaker and, as the next image will attest, a good friend.
"But of course," you cry, "we know all this!" Very true, but allow me to reveal the man beneath the tough guy image. The sensitive man of extraordinary artistic talent, the visionary creator. Along the way, I shall interpret these often abstract, but always beautiful images, to allow you a window into the mind of Mr. Hirst. Of course, these are only my interpretations, but FUCK YOU, I HAVE DEGREES IN THIS SHIT. ARE YOU FUCKING QUESTIONING ME!? HEY, FUCK OFF. GET OFF ME, YOU STUPID CU... Ah.
Thank you nurse. Let us begin with a look at one of the maestro's lesser works.
Simply titled "What", I feel this image is perhaps a representation of a man attempting to break free of an ordinary life. The building in the background represents The Workplace. It is a grey and cold place. In contrast, the painter has depicted himself as the driver of a colourful chariot. Not only is it a means of escape, but also reveals rebellious tendancies. See how the vehicle skids across the grass, ruining the clinically cut landscape, as if to say; "SUCK ON THAT ONE, COCK ENDS, I'M OFF." Truly the work of a man apart, but nothing special in the grand scheme. Let us move on to greater things.
Now, the meaning is very clear. Again, very simply titled "Never Foget", it is obvious that this is a religious piece, depicting man's complacency in a modern, godless society. Observe the face of the subject, caught somewhere between terror and despair. See those eyes. You can almost hear his words. "Why? Why did I turn my back on god?" And yet it is too late. It is truly a day he can never foget.
The loss of memory and fear of the opposite sex are very intrinsic in most of Mr. Hirst's finer works. Titled "5601558598_08fd590d37_o.jpg" this piece shows fear at a modern society of equality. While one would question the nature of such a statement, it is undeniable that this is still a uniquely beautiful image. Most curious is the inclusion of Bobby Davro and a cockney. Many scholars have attempted to decipher the intent, but it is perhaps best left a mystery.
"5601558492_21ca1158c0_o.jpg" This represents the artist's dismay at a society that is compelled towards the trivial and less interesting facets of other countries. He once said in an interview given to the Sunday Times; "If she were really into Japan, she'd be driving a Daihatsu Stanza. And not your standard run of the mill Stanza, but the special model, the one that has the optional felt lined glovebox."
One of Mr. Hirst's more hard hitting works. I feel this perhaps speaks for itself.
Mr. Hirst has made many attempts to break into art design in the games industry. Alas, it seems these days speed of work beats out quality. This famously took three weeks of painstaking attention to detail.
Finally, I present a series of portraits, the first three subjects are unknown, other than what is in the titles. The fourth is a portrait of myself. I can only guess at the line of reasoning behind such an abstract piece, but I am none the less honoured for it.
"Knotts Landing"
"Ameer"
"Discofrock"
"Maindrianer (Adam)"
And there you have it. As I have said, I have grown quite a close bond with this singular talent over the years. It is inevitable that his genius would rub off on others, such is his enthusiasm for creation, his lust for life. And so I present my own tribute to Mr. Daniel Hirst. Here's to you, Sir.
May your creative spirit live long after you've gone.
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It is my hope that once destroyed, you burned it to ash and defenstrated said ash into a source of running water, lest a drop of blood cause the Revolution to rise again.
Then I hope you did the sensible thing and ordered a search party to burn the remaining home console versions. All of them. In the whole world.
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Well, it certainly does capture his penetrating, remorseless stare rather well.
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Delfi, don't! You have so much to live for! So much starship design to sperg over! So many things to program!
PLEASE, TAKE THAT SHOTGUN OUT OF YOUR MOUTH.
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